It Is What It Is

We’ve all heard this phrase before. Something happens—maybe it’s not so good or not what is expected—and people say, “It is what it is”. Have you heard people saying this lately? I sometimes wonder what they mean.

Is it that the situation or circumstance is not so good and they are acknowledging that sh@$ happens? Are they seeing the situation for what it really is and are assessing their various options? Maybe they are trying to remove themselves from the attachment and emotional content of the situation, so they can see it for what it really is.

Whatever their rational, I think it is a good statement. If we use it as a cue to see a situation or circumstance simply as something that has no meaning whatsoever, we can take a charge off it. We can look at “what is”, rather than our concept of it.

When we are faced with any given situation, we observe it and then interpret it. The thing is, everyone interprets life through a different set of filters. These filters are based on the experiences they have had in previous situations with a similar energy and how they responded to that energy in the past.

From that first experience, they form a concept or a judgment about what happened. This concept actually replaces the situation and they no longer see the situation for what it truly is. So, when a situation or circumstance with a similar energy comes up and they say, “It is what it is,” what they really mean is, “It is my concept of what it is.”

Depending on the emotions felt during the initial experience, the concept may be good, bad or avoid at all costs. If the judgement is, this is bad or must be avoided; the situation or circumstance had an energy that brought on an emotion that the person was not okay with feeling. But usually the concept of the situation is actually far scarier than the situation itself.

When people only live their concept of a situation, rather than really experiencing the energy and the feelings they have about it, they can create real suffering for themselves. People can go through their whole lives in fear of an experience because of the concept they have about it. If they would only allow themselves to truly experience the energy and emotion they determined was bad, they could really see the situation or circumstance for what it is and stop their suffering.

So the next time you are in a situation that is not so pleasant, can you really say, “It is what it is”, or are you, instead, experiencing your concept of what it is. If you feel fear, tell yourself, “Bring it on!”, accept and explore all of the feeling and then you’ll know!