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May 14, 2012 @ 10:15 AM
Dr. Paul Newton 2012
On the topic of how we get in our own way, another important concept is the fact that we control our feelings. We decide that the timing is not right for a certain feeling or that we do not like a particular type of emotion and so we override it with our minds. I’m not referring to the emotions that we are fearful of (although we control those too). I’m talking about suppressing passionate and inspiring kinds of feelings.
How often do you put the brakes on your dreams because it just does not make sense? “You can’t do that!” “Nobody does that.” “You have a job and bills to pay.” “There’s not enough time in a day...
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Fitting in can seem so hard. Our culture has so many rules about how you must be, what you must think and what you must do. When we line up with all the rules, we get accepted. So we learn and conform to the rules as rejection from the culture is the last thing anyone wants. The fear of being ostracized is so great that we will do whatever it takes to fit in, even if it means sacrificing who we really are. As an individual, you may think that your true self and the passion you have is not what people want or need. You might find it easier to change who you are in order to be loved. The truth is, you are unique, critically important and exactly what the world needs now.&...
True compassion is to understand the suffering of another in the absence of pity or sorrow. When you feel sorry for someone else, you are actually taking on their emotional pain - and that does not serve anyone.
Is there something that you want that you don’t have? You know. Something that would make life better than it is now. Is it a possession, like a car, house, a certain amount of money or a toy? Do you want an intimate relationship, friendships or esteem amongst peers? Could it be time and the financial freedom to get away for an extended period, travel to incredible places, work on a dream project or take up a new hobby? Perhaps it is simply more energy and vitality, better health, a happier emotional state or increased presence and gratitude. Whatever the want is, do you feel like you deserve it? Is it something that you feel worthy of having?
Have you ever had the realization that life is actually really simple? Perhaps you read something that revealed the beauty of being grateful for things you had taken for granted, or you saw someone being a shining example of having the courage to be his or herself. At that moment you think, “Is it really that easy? Do I simply need to be myself and live in gratitude?” And then your mind pipes in and tells you, “No. It’s complicated. You have all these problems that make it hard for you.” And so you go on living the same way you always have, hoping that it will get easier.
Ever notice the funny way life works? We think we have huge problems due to enormous obstacles posed by situations and circumstances in our lives. We may sit paralyzed by these problems, tolerating undesirable conditions in our lives and wishing that things would just change. We could struggle for long periods, even years, with our problems. Then we have a breakthrough, we find a solution and our life improves. We grow and begin to enjoy a new standard of living. We see that we had been the problem and we were getting in our own way the whole time.
In life, we can be assured that there will be times of challenge and uncertainty. It is the times of difficulty that provide us with the opportunity to realize our strengths and allow us to grow and learn.
How would it be to awaken to your true self, completely free of all concepts of the mind and demands of the ego? Can you imagine just getting right down to your core nature, where there is only connection and service to others? 
As I am writing this article, my dad is recovering from angioplasty in a hospital in Hong Kong. He is doing well and should be released from hospital tomorrow at which time he and my mother will take a hotel room to rest and wait until he has the go ahead to fly home. They will be happy to get away from the never-ending buzz of the hospital where they’ve spent the last two weeks and to enjoy some peace and privacy. We are all very eager for them to get home!
Well are you? Meaning, in this moment, are you filled with the wonder of all the possibilities that exist? Is your focus totally in the present, just being with “what is” so that you may truly receive the gift of “the now?” If you are not, then what are you?