The process of life involves adaptation to constant change and growth. This often includes healing in places where we have needed to maintain a sense of constancy in order to feel safe in the midst of changes we found overwhelming. When we are not growing, we are dying, which means seeking constancy and safety is actually a hindrance to life. This will show up as a problem in our lives in our physical, emotional, mental or spiritual health. When we want to heal and grow, assessing particular aspects of our lives through AAA--Awareness, Acknowledgment and Acceptance can help us. This process can help us to find problems, get the learning from them, and apply it. We can find the gift in the situation which moves us to a place of freedom within the situation.
At first we may only be aware that there are things that are happening in our lives, our relationships or our bodies that we do not like and that we wish to be free of. It could be illness, relationship problems, self value issues, financial concerns or a lack of meaning and purpose. All we know is that we are lacking something in our lives or that we have something that we would be better off without. We are looking for a solution that will fix our problem and make us happier. Anyone or anything that can help would be welcome.
At this point, what is really necessary is some awareness. We need to realize what is happening and identify what it really is. This means to address what is happening in our lives without a concept or story about it. This means that labels such as particular disease names, emotional conditions, rationalizations and dramatizations need to be set aside. What is really there, in its nakedness and rawness, needs to be seen.
Awareness just means that we call it what it is. It may mean that we just admit that we feel lousy all the time and have no energy to do what we want. Maybe we always feel sad and don't choose any of the exciting options that present themselves. Perhaps we finally admit that we spend money faster than we make it and do nothing to learn about how to manage and grow our wealth. We may even state that we don't know what we would like in a relationship and that it would be a really good thing to know. We just call it what it is and drop the story.
Next, we move onto acknowledgment. We look at what is -- what we have been doing, accepting or living -- and we find out how we have been relating to the situation. We now consider the story we have about it and the impact that living within the situation has on our lives. We may be feeling helpless. We may blame people and circumstances. We may feel stuck in a pattern we can't get out of. What we want to do is acknowledge what we have been accepting and doing so we can decide what we want and set a course to get there.
With acknowledgment we get the lessons: we apply the learning and we set goals. We find our motivation in the fear of what we don't want in our lives, while our pull towards a compelling future propels us forward. Here we step into our power and move beyond the fears and illusions that have kept us paralyzed. We build up energy and excitement for what we really want so that we are ready to do whatever it takes. Next, we resolve the situations once and for all.
Finally, we move into acceptance. We still see the situation and it may still be in our lives but now it doesn't have a hold on us. It just is and we just are. We can look back on the circumstance that was such an obstacle to our well-being and see it as a gift. We recognize how it provided the challenge we needed to reorganize our lives and we are grateful for what it has brought us. We are grateful for the situation because now we can only see its gift.
The process of AAA brings us through the seasons of Discover, Transform and Awaken. It is a powerful process to apply to any situation or circumstance in our lives where healing and growth is called for. Each A will be addressed in an upcoming article. For some great insights on how to begin applying this life-changing process attend our Discover Workshop and our Intro to SRI Workshop. Bringing a partner or friend with you will greatly facilitate the learning and application of this process. Make sure to sign up and reserve seats for you and a guest at the next workshop.
